Blog Archives

Why Do Bullies Bully?

…It is not easy watching our children sulk or cry after school. It is not easy watching their self-esteem slip. It is not easy watching our child become mean as a result of being bullied. We need to teach our children when they are bullied, it has absolutely nothing to do with them, none whatsoever. This is the first and most important aspect of it all. The children being bullied need to know this to keep their sanity and their self-esteem in check.

The second thing they need to know can help serve as a two-fold and create compassion in your child. Bullies are usually having a hard time with something, whether they realize it or not…
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Animals Have Feelings To

John Deere and Coontail Napping Together

Have you ever looked at your animal and wondered what goes through their mind? Some people treat pets as their babies, a part of the family. Others, unfortunately, treat them as kicking and punching bags. There is nothing sadder than seeing an animal or human abused. Read the rest of this entry

Feeling Down, Need A HUGE Inspiration?

Nick Vujicic

No matter what you are going through, you will be okay. Sometimes life seems very unfair to some of us and we may never understand why. We may never have our answers but we have to keep faith. I was recently touched by an individual that made my problems seem so small. I have always said, when our problems seem big, there is always someone, somewhere, worse off. I believe in praying for people who hurt me and I try to do good. I am saved and I realize, I will never be perfect, but sometimes life throws a punch so big, we have a hard time getting back up.

I could not sleep one night and was channel surfing, when I heard a message that glued my eyes to the television. He had me laughing and crying at the same time. He knows all our pains. His name was Nick Vujicic. He is a preacher with no arms or legs, no limbs. He had the biggest smile and was such a beautiful person. My heart ached for him and rejoiced at the same time. He was born without arms and legs and begged God his whole life, for the miracle of arms and legs. He said he finally understood what God meant when He impressed on him, “No Nick, I am not delivering your miracle…YOU… are the miracle!” Read the rest of this entry

Convincing Your Child To Be Honest With You And Confide In You

One of the most difficult jobs as a parent is trusting your children to make the right decisions with today’s peer pressure looming heavily everywhere they turn. They always tell you they will not make the mistake of trying drugs, drinking or committing sexual acts. They either win you over with the angelic innocent act or they become angry because they feel you do not trust them. How many times has your teenage daughter stormed off because you reminded her not to give in to peer pressure when she is with her friends? You can talk until you are blue in the face and feel like you are a broken record playing over and over, while feeling as if you are getting nowhere. Do you lay awake at night worrying, praying that you have taught them right from wrong? Do you feel like pulling your hair out or restricting them until their privileges are gone? Sadly, you can tell them how much you love them and you are only trying to protect them, but it goes in one ear and out the other. Part of it remains in their memory but we have to make sure they are really listening and making the correct choices, on their own. “On their own” is the keyword here.

Do you know that their friends are smoking pot, in both public and private schools, at P.E., in the bathrooms, and even in some classrooms? Both private and public students are buying it for five dollars and taking it home. Some are sharing and convincing friends to try it and some are smoking it alone, once at home. Your children will tell you they have friends who now need more than the high from pot and are doing more serious drugs, such as cocaine, crack, ecstasy and shooting up drugs. Some are already dying at an early age and the parents are oblivious to it. They go to school and function but no one is reaching out to them. Their weight changes, their eating habits and daily habits all change. The other children notice it, but are too afraid to speak up. To add to your pile of worries, when children are under the influence, they are twice as likely to have sex because they are either relaxed or pressured and you are not there to stop them. When your children spend the night off, how much do you really know about their friends, their parents, or their siblings? Most children try for the first time smoking, drinking, using drugs and having sex at a friend’s house more than any other location.

What is a parent to do? Read the rest of this entry

Are You Hurting?

Have you been hurt by someone or something that hurt you so deep you feel you will never recover from it? Have you had someone instantly taken or ripped from your life to never see them again? Have you been abused mentally or physically? Have you ever lost all of your possessions and had to start over? Have you lost a child or a parent before you felt it was time? Have you ever been homeless? Have you ever been raped, molested, robbed, or attacked? Have you survived a natural disaster? Have you ever been kidnapped? What is your pain?

My heart aches for you who are hurting or have been hurt in the past and cannot seem to move past it. I have been through so much in my life and I know there are many of you who are suffering right now.  My trials and traumatic experiences are real and I personally know what it feels like to suffer and feel alone. You are not alone! When I look back at everything I have been through, it amazes me that I’m not in a mental institute or living under a bridge. There were times I wanted to give up, but I decided to take it one day at a time and I knew that I was worthy of a good life, a happy life. I am only 38 years old and I am a widow with three children. The path to my here and now has been very long, very excruciating and very confusing. I learned to mask my pain and hide my embarrassment very well. So well, that only my closest friends know “only a part” of what I have been through. I found it useless to reach out for help because family and friends expect you to recover in a certain amount of time, regardless if you could or could not. No one truly knew how to help me because they either haven’t been through it themselves or they were hurting also and did not know how to heal from their own pain. I always thought…how could they help me?

I am pulling it up by the bootstraps and I pray that my experiences will help you rise up from your pain, to start your new, happy life. This is your chance to finally realize, you are able to let go of the pain and when you smile again, to really mean it. This is your chance to help others, who are hurting and lost, to find encouragement and strength. I will be sharing the horrific events of my life with you and welcome your comments for us to discuss and share. Be sure and check back for information. By sharing your pain, others will realize they are not alone. You may choose to remain confidential or you can own the pain and finally release it for good. However you choose to participate is completely up to you. My goal is for you to begin pulling it up by the bootstraps and create the diamond within you. Read the rest of this entry

Staying Strong After The Death Of A Loved One

I am a widowed mother of three children, ages 12 to 20. The events in my life started as a young child. Everyone tells me that my Daddy loved me liked no other.  He wanted a little girl more than anything and said he would send a little boy back. Daddy died a few days after I turned seven years old, from a car crash with a log truck. The log came through the windshield and hit him in the head. The log went out the trunk and slung his car, a hundred to two hundred yards, off the road, into a Burger King drive through. His brain had major swelling and he was in and out of a coma for a week, before he finally died. His last words were, “Where is Christy?” I get a lump every time I think of this. I have so many questions… I also have regrets. I constantly think, if Daddy was alive… I could stop by his house. I could cook him dinner. I could call him for help with my vehicle, or home, or kids. I could learn so much from him. He worked for a Publishing Company and his hobby at home was rebuilding hot rods and motorcycles and painting them. I have missed out on so much in life because I do not have my Daddy. My children have missed out on so much. My son looks just like him.

There is so much pain and sadness. It hurts that I no longer have him in my life, but it also hurts that it affected my Mom. The love she felt for him is still undeniable, thirty-two years later. His boots sat by the back door, just as if he was home and took them off himself. She no longer listens to rock and roll. She still cries at the thought of him. I never could understand why she could not handle certain things, such as watching old home movies. They comforted me. Why would they not comfort her?

I, now, know exactly why! My husband was murdered, at our home, and I lost a part of myself. I could no longer watch his favorite shows. I could not drink coffee, because he made me coffee every morning. I could not listen to the radio. I could not go to the grocery store because he loved to cook. I could not sleep or eat. I could not visit anyone. I could not go anywhere. I was frozen in time. I was lost and my world was spinning. Read the rest of this entry

Encouragement For Your Pain

You can hold on tight and let life take you where it will, or you can pull yourself up by the bootstraps and take control of your situations. I, definitely, would not wish the pain and traumatic events of my life on my worst enemy. The things I have experienced are painful, humiliating, demeaning, and torturous. I chose to take the high road and remember exactly who I am. I am a fun, loving, giving, caring, prayerful person. I am not better than anyone else and no one is better than me. I am okay with who I am, on the inside. I am a normal human being just like you are. I value my life, in short, I like me despite what I have been through. Don’t get me wrong, I have had a good life, between the bad, the good just didn’t last very long.

My goal is for those of you who have been hurt, or are hurting, to know, you can start your new life, no matter what you have been through or are going through now. You might not see the light now, but you will. It may take much longer than most people expect. My family and most of my friends do not understand why it took me so long to heal and move forward. They could not see the baby steps I was taking everyday. They were not in my shoes and no-one can walk in your shoes. You have to find your own path, as hard as that may seem, with some soul searching you will get there. I pray that my life experiences of pain and many trials will give you hope and encouragement to pull yourself up by the bootstraps, just as I have done and continue to do, every second of every day. You are not alone in your suffering. Open your heart and pay it forward, to others who are hurting. Each time you help someone, they are healing, and you are healing. You may not feel it instantly, but trust that you are.

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