Teenagers Who Stay Drunk or High
Posted by Christine Smith-Johnson
I was shocked today to see how many underage drinkers are bragging online about staying wasted. I was horrified! One fifteen year old girl was bragging about staying drunk and she just had a friend die from alcohol poisoning. Another friend of hers almost died and had to have her stomach pumped. Where is the fun in that? Why would anyone want to follow in those shoes? Some were bragging of drinking in the mornings and driving to work drunk or going to play in their football games drunk. Talk about an easy way to leave on a stretcher. They were drunk while they were online and already talking about getting drunk tomorrow. They are puking and falling down and still want to drive in an hour.
You have so many people who love you and worry about your future. Drinking to have fun and look cool is so uncool. It makes you look foolish and dumb. None of you are dumb. You are just making bad choices. Do you want to suffer later in life because of the choices you make now? Do you want to die? Do you want to kill someone while driving drunk? Look at the news, it happens everyday. What if a drunk driver kills your parents, grandparents, or a brother or sister? How would you feel?
Any of you who are drinking underage, need to go to your parents or someone you trust and tell them you have a problem and need help. You have to want help. Alcoholism is a disease. It will kill you and your family. There is a difference between being a drinker and being a dangerous alcoholic. It is different for everyone but it is also the same for everyone when it is too late. Some will say it is never to late and I agree with this, but sometimes people lose the willpower to fight.
Look at the families that live in abuse. I bet you each one of them involves an alcoholic or drug addict. You have to learn how to process your emotions and not turn to alcohol, drugs, or sex to fill your hole and mask your pain. Your pain will never go away if you do. It will only get larger. Look at people who commit crimes. They were never taught to deal with their emotions. They get angry or frustrated and lose it. Had they been taught coping skills, most of them would never have committed the crime.
If you are drinking too much or using drugs or sex as an escape goat, please stop. You might not believe this now, but you will regret it later. You cannot take back anything you give away now. Instead of focusing on partying and friends, focus on plans and goals. What do you want to do when you grow up? It will be here before you know it. Start planning for college. If your family cannot afford college, make sure you study and get good grades. You can apply for financial aid to help pay for college. The financial aid may even help you with gas and lunch and your books. If you do not have a car, carpool with a friend or family member. Start thinking about what you want to do. Go online and research it. Talk to people about it. The more you accomplish, the better you will feel about yourselves. If you do not know what you want to do when older, pray about it. It will come to you.
Focus on helping others. Everywhere you turn, someone is hurting and needs help. Everyone needs someone to talk to. Sometimes we are surrounded by many people and still feel lonely. You all need to truly know in your heart, you are not alone. You have family and friends that love you. You have to know that. It is selfish to self destruct when so many people need you. For those of you who feel like you do not have family or friends, you would be surprised at how many people online will instantly become your friends, just by sharing your pain. Of course, do not give out your personal information and do not ever meet them in person. We have to many kidnappings and killings going on in our society. I have run across more people online who are hurting than in real life. Of course, everyone hurts, but on the internet, you cannot see their faces and they open up more. They cry for help. Some mention their pain only a little, but after being spoken to, they will open up loving the chance to talk to someone.
Most of you want help but are too afraid to ask. Do not be afraid. Your family loves you. If you live in an abusive home, then ask someone else you trust. There is always a solution, a good solution. You are young enough that you can bounce back from this fairly quick. If you wait until you are older, it might be to hard to accomplish. Please learn from mistakes, no matter if they are your mistakes, or your parents, families, friends,or even a stranger’s mistake.
If you are still afraid to talk to someone, ask a friend to be there with you when you do approach someone for help. This works wonders in easing the tension. Chose your friend wisely, you would not want to upset your parents or whoever you are talking to by having a friend around who is not taking it seriously. You will be surprised how many friends you have that want help just like you, but are also afraid to ask. Start talking to your friends and read between the lines, look at their body language. You will be able to tell who wants to stop partying all the time. Parties can be just as much fun without drinking, or stopping after a drink or two. At least you will wake up the next day without being embarrassed about something you did. You might not be embarrassed now, but you will be in ten years. I promise you that.
If your friends are pressuring you into drinking or anything else that is wrong, then stand up to them and say no. If they get mad, they are not your friends. If they are your friends, they will respect you for trying. Maybe you can be the light for them and you can help them.
Some of you have lost your self-esteem due to bullies. Bullies can be strangers, friends, or family. If you are dealing with bullies, always remember the bully is hurting about something and they do not know how to deal with it. It has absolutely nothing to do with you. They just take their frustrations out on anyone who allows it. I never encouraged my children to put themselves in a dangerous situation, but it helped them to know this about bullies. It gave them the courage to say no, you will not bully me. You are hurting and you need to learn how to deal with it. They either left them alone after that or became friends and had someone to talk to. God will put people in your path to help, if you pay attention. Sometimes it may be to help them and sometimes it will be to help you. Have faith and show God’s love. That is why we are here, to show love. That means, first loving yourself.
Now is a good time to spend with your family and elders. Your elders will be gone soon and you will miss them like crazy! As you get older, you will think back on your memories with family more than the memories with your friends. I know you do not believe this now, but you will see. You will remember me when you are old and say that woman was right. The best times of my life were with my family. Even the family that is not perfect. There is no such thing as a perfect family, it only looks that way from the outside.
If you cannot stand the thought of chosing family over friends, invite your friend to go hang out with you and Grandma or Grandpa, or maybe your aunt or uncle. Older relatives can be so funny. Your friend will also have lasting memories and you will bond and become closer and that may carry you two together throughout your adult life. The best times of my life were in the mountains with my Daddy’s side of the family. They were dirt poor but we had so much fun. I spent every summer with them until I started my family. Now, I miss them so much. My kids love the stories I tell them about my childhood and they love going to visit where I grew up, even though they are all dead and gone, except for my cousins and their families.
You can create good times and good memories no matter what is going on in your life. If you are hurting, think about your funny memories. Laugh and tell your stories. My husband was murdered and it was the hardest thing I have ever gone through. We had some really bad times, but we also had good times. I talk about him all the time and keep his memory alive to other people so he will never be forgotten. I can find so much to laugh about when I think about him. I can get mad to, but it never lasts long, I always go back to the funny things. It helps me deal with it. Find what helps you deal with your pain, instead of drinking or drugs. Over time, you will look back and be proud of how you handled it.
You need to learn how to deal with your emotions so you can teach your children, later in life. If your parents never really taught you or did not know how to teach you to process all the feelings we feel, start helping yourself and talk to people. God knows, we can feel fifty different emotions in one day. It can be overwhelming at times. When that happens, pray for strength and ask yourself who can you help. It will take your mind off your problems. It is not the same as ignoring your problems. When you are helping others, it changes your frame of mind and puts you in a better position to think about what you experienced.
If any of you are lost and doing things because you are hurting, start thinking about other people who are hurting. Somewhere, someone needs you. They need you to be strong for them.
My blog has a link to someone who will always lift your spirits and will change you when you see him. Your problems that seem so huge now, will suddenly take on a different light. His name is Nick Vujicic and he is so funny! I love him and think he is so adorable. He is under the link inspiration and HUGE inspiration. Please check him out. He will amaze you! You can also find him on YouTube. Anyone who watches him will automatically be blessed. He tried to kill himself at an incredibly young age and kept praying to God for a miracle. He finally realized that he was the miracle and did not need what he was asking for. Please go watch him. You will feel his love and determination. HE WILL PROBABLY BE THE BIGGEST INSPIRATION YOU AND I WILL EVER KNOW.
I am praying for all of you who are drinking and doing other things, to find your way in life, and to be able to deal with your pain in a constructive manner. Please, please, stop thinking it is funny to kill your liver. If you stop now, your liver will probably repair itself. If not, you may end up with liver failure and die from it. I know so many people who have died from alcohol poisoning and it is a sad thing when they were loved by so many. If only they had stopped drinking or slowed down, they would still be here with us. When you are older and if you chose to drink legally, drink in moderation. Some will say refrain from drinking at all, that is fine to. Regardless, learn your limit and respect it. You only have one body and one life. Please take care of yourself. If you don’t, who will?
About Christine Smith-JohnsonI am a widowed mother of three children, ages 11 to 19. I hope to encourage you through my trials and traumatic experiences. All my life, I dealt with heartache, and kept my head held high. Recently, I dealt with a heartache so big, it consumed me. Every part of me was lost and hurting. I never thought I would make it through. I did and I want to help you make it through your heartache, no matter how big or small it may seem to you.
Posted on February 1, 2011, in Dealing With Death, Elderly Issues, Health Issues, Honesty Issues, Parenting Issues, Paying It Forward, Relationship Issues, School Issues, Substance Abuse, Teen Issues, Victim Abuse and tagged alcohol, bully, drugs, family, liver, love, parenting, partying, relationship, school, self esteem, substance abuse, teen, teenager, underage. Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.